Sunday, November 8, 2015

Fear and loathing in Arizona

"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light." - Plato

Leah Hennel - Calgary Herald
That said, it's fair to say I'm scared shitless. Not just because of the heavy goals I've burdened myself with but mostly cuz this is uncharted territory for me. The longest duration I've spent running to date is 24 hours; in Glendale, AZ over the turn of the year I'll be tripling that to a whopping 72 hours. I think I peed my pants a bit just writing that. The Across the Years Ultra Marathon (ATY) is host to runners from around the globe running 24, 48, 72hr and 6 day time duration's. The spotlight on the 6 day runners as they rack up a stupid amount of miles over one day short of a week. Essentially I'll be running the half marathon equivalent of the multi-day ultra events. Thinking of it in that context will put me at ease, maybe...not really, not at all...crap this is gonna hurt like hell! The thing I have going for me is I think I'll be really good at this multi-day running thingamabob. I mean, I didn't suck at the 24 hour race and looking around me at other runners during my last 24 hour race I don't think I was hurting as bad as they were. So with seven weeks to go before the dance I want to take this time to discus the good, the bad, and the downright ugly sides of fear.

Fear of the unknown is probably the most common reason why runners don't push past their familiar borders to attempt new feats. The blame is normally cast on time restraints, other commitments and other socially acceptable reasons that are easy to discuss with others whereas if the reason for not signing up for your first marathon was fear it would most likely be frowned upon and make you look weak. We all have fear, it has its place in our sport.

Two runners named Mary and Jill both have run a number of marathons and both share the desire to extend themselves and attempt a 50 mile ultra marathon. They have heard the same stories told in their running group on struggles of ultra racing. At 16 weeks before the race they decide to sign up for an ultra. The fear sets in. They read the same web sites, blogs and pretty much anything else they can gather to get advice on how to do this. Mary processes this fear and decides to get to work and let fear be the fuel to drive her through training. Jill struggles to adapt to her fears and quickly finds herself falling behind on training that is now fueled by self doubt. With 5 weeks to go before the race Mary worries about the enormity of this task she is about to embark on so she dials in her training. Jill's fear is coupled with the realities of being under trained as the day approaches and curbs what's left of her deflated enthusiasm, making it all too easy to repeatedly hit the snooze button thus shortening her much needed long runs. On race day Mary uses her fear throughout the day to propel her and surprises herself with a podium finish in her age group. Jill's day never happened. The fear of the pain and suffering due to her lack of fitness was all she needed to not drive out to the race start. Mary goes on to run many 50 mile races and one day completes a 100 mile ultra marathon. Jill upset, vows to steer clear of disappointment and never entertain a silly idea like that ever again. Both Mary and Jill had a similar fear but what they did with it ended very differently. When fear is present so is the coward and the courageous. Do you let fear hold you back or do you use it to push you further?
"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." - Nelson Mandela

Some falter, some succeed. Many crumble at first thought while a few soar higher than first dreamed possible. I'm sure someone much smarter than I could give a synopsis of the inner workings of the mind and why we all seem to adapt to fear differently.

At my first 72 hour on Dec. 29- Jan. 1 there are many specific things I could fixate on that should scare my socks off but I must say the biggest fear is the fear of not having reaching the true limits I know I am capable of.


Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Checkin' In

I am about three weeks into training for my 72 hours at the ATY and I've gotta say things are looking up. My friends tell me I don't update my blog enough so by writing this I intend to silence them. Three weeks ago I got a last minute text to be a part of the MitoCanada team at the Grizzly Ultra in Canmore. The Mito team has been doing incredible work raising funds and creating awareness for families with children battling this debilitating disease. Simply put by my friend Blaine Penny, "We run for those who can't". Not only did I have a blast that day hanging with friends at the Nordic Centre but we also won the race setting a new CR despite the slowpoke on the lead leg (me). The rest of the week I put up some descent mileage trying to slow my pace as I get ready for the painfully slow shuffle commonly used in these multi-day races. Saturday Oct. 17 my friend Misti suggested I run the MEC marathon the next day. Truth be told I was planning to run 40-50K anyway so I told her sure, what the hell. I
showed up race morning to register, the cost was $30, yeah that's right 30 BUCKS and that's the cost to us last minute folk. I later found out it was $15 for those with better planning skills than Mr. Proctor. The gun went off and my plan went to pot right away. I got talking with the lead group and my plan of holding a 4 min/km pace throughout turned into a 4:20 min/km first half simply due to the excellent conversation that we all were having. Half way in I picked it up to 3:45 min/km and came in around 2hrs 53min. I was very happy with the effort and how I felt at the end. Oddly enough this was my very first marathon, weird huh? Costing $30 I thought the race would be dodgy at best but I was pleasantly surprised with the race markings, aid stations, fuel provided, and start and finish line. I will totally be doing another MEC race again. Only two days later I ran at the Miles for Microcredit fundraiser who's intention was to gather as many
Calgarians as possible and try to collectively run, bike, or walk the distance from here to Guatemala to deliver much needed micro-credit to women in need. The week prior I was contacting as many runners I could to get them out to the Prince's Island Park in Calgary to join me in the attempt. I spent the whole morning and early afternoon circling back and running with friends. Problem was that all my fast friends showed around lunch so there they were ready to giv'er while I was already 50-60K in. Sheesh who needs enemies when you've got friends like these. The day came to a close with me running 67K. Since then I've run a few longer runs and am generally feeling great. Sharon's support for my questionable sport has been unwavering, thanks Sharon! The monkeys are busy having fun at school and the funds collected for the Care4Rare fundraiser are quickly approaching 5G's.

The closer I get to race date the slower my pace will get in order to prepare my body for the task at hand. In my opinion, the slower the pace the more collision takes place with every hit so an obvious adaptation must slowly occur between now and then to ease my tissues into the plan of impacting the ground 600,000 to 700,000 times in the three days. Now that I've put it that way I'm not so sure this is a good idea...


Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Across The Years for Care 4 Rare

In Glendale AZ from December 29 through January 1 I will be racing my very first multi-day race at the renowned Across The Years ultramarathon. The race will see runners run 24 hr, 48 hr, 72 hr, and 6 days straight with the objective of accumulating as many miles as one can travel within the time allotted. The rules are simple: run, walk or crawl. Sleep when you want, stop when needed and when stepping off the track one must re-enter where they exited. It's a flat course, incredibly well supported, and has stiff competition making the race a perfect venue to rack up a huge amount of miles. Sharon and the kids will be track-side along with my brother Dan, sister-in-law Laura, and my Mom and Dad kindly offering me their support as I attempt my largest running goal yet. The lofty goal has two parts, one of far more importance.

One goal is to break the 48 and 72 hour Canadian records. The 48 hour record is currently held by Canadian running legend Trishul Cherns set in 1995 when he ran 355.875K. The 72 hour record is 496.482K held by a pedestrian racer by the name of Richard Lacouse, completed in New York city in December of 1881. Yes, that's right, 1881! That's a 134 year old record!!! In a future blog post I'll write about the fascinating pedestrian racing history in the late 1800's and I promise you it'll blow your mind; the truly amazing athletic feats our ancestors were achieving well over 100 years ago. After setting a new Canadian 24 hour record in April 2015 of running 257.093K, I feel these two goals are lofty but yet obtainable. I hope to only sleep 2-3 times for a maximum of 90 minutes per sleep session. Should get interesting.

My other goal, and by far the most important of the two, is to create awareness and funding for an organization that has grown near and dear to us Proctors called Care 4 Rare. This is a wonderful group of scientists, clinicians, bioinformaticians, and researchers with the goal of improved clinical care for patients and families affected by rare diseases.

Our story began in March of 2010 when our son Sam was rushed to the hospital with flaccid paralysis. Terrified, Sharon and I looked on as our 13 month old perfectly healthy son was now hardly able to turn his head and blink. After numerous tests the doctors at the Alberta Children's Hospital informed us that there was nothing they could find that caused this episode and it was most likely a virus that attacked Sam's brain and that he will most likely recover quickly and this will be just a bad memory. Sam's recovery was swift,  all except we noticed he was all wobbly and wibbley. In March of 2011 our world was shaken when Sam was hospitalized yet again with the exact same symptoms that crippled him one year prior. This round the recovery was slower and the worry deepened as Sharon and I came to grips that this was a serious ongoing issue that needed serious
attention. A team of neurologists, geneticists, and countless other doctors combined efforts. A trip was made to the Mayo Clinic and test after test were performed to identify what was ailing Sam but nothing was found. In the past 5 years, we received over-the-top support from government agencies, organizations like Cause And Effect, physiotherapists, OT's, and most notably Sam's CDF (Child Development Facilitator) Nicole Lightfoot. Sam will be turning seven this coming February. He finds all gross and fine motor skills challenging such as walking, feeding himself, writing, and everyday things we all take for granted. We've been spending the past few years coming to grips with the notion that we will most likely never have an idea what is causing our son's ataxia (lack of balance and coordination) and better preparing him for a life of challenges...

...That is until three months ago when we had a meeting with geneticist Dr. Micheil Innes from a group called Care 4 Rare. He explained a study called whole exome sequencing in where they could investigate Sam's entire genetic data in search for the glitch that causes Sam's ataxia. This is the latest and most detailed genetic investigation method. It was music to our ears when he broke the news that Sam and 499 other children with undiagnosed diseases and disorders from all across Canada will partake in this $11 million study to identify new genetic diseases. Any parent will tell you that the feeling of not having answers and being unable to help your child is one of the lowest and most helpless feelings but now thanks to Care 4 Rare we have a renewed optimism and new found hope. Dr. Innes explained that given recent studies similar to this one there could be a 30-35% chance of a diagnosis upon completion of this study. THIS IS HUGE!

Currently, 25% rare disease patients wait 5-30 years for a diagnosis; 40% initially receive a misdiagnosis; and half will never receive a diagnosis. Securing a clear diagnosis means that patients and families can make future projections about their healthcare, tap into best practice guidelines, seek reproductive counseling, and potentially start therapies.  

In the past 5 years of parenting a special needs child we have found it astonishing just how many special needs children are undiagnosed. This baffled me, until I realized that scientists have just scratched the surface of the underbelly of diseases and dysfunctions science has yet to understand. What upsets me the most is that while Sharon and I are celebrating being part of this study there are thousands of helpless and hopeless families, many of them worse off than us, still left wanting an answer about their child's rare disease. This is especially disheartening knowing that the technology is ready and available but the only thing lacking is funding.

PLEASE HELP BY DONATING HERE

Some say the reason why rare diseases don't receive the attention and funding that known diseases get is because people don't identify with things they don't understand. We can all put a face to Down syndrome, Cerebral Palsy and Autism. Here is the face of a rare disease...and he is beautiful.









Thursday, October 1, 2015

A Quick Update

A lot of you have been asking me how I've been feeling since my major and premature crash and burn at Run Rabbit Run only two weeks ago. The simple and honest answer is that I feel great. I've gone for 8 runs since and all's good in the hood. I haven't been pushing the pace or distance but I feel a bit of conservatism is necessary during the weeks following a hospital visit. The doctors agreed it wasn't my heart that failed only 2.5 miles into the last race but a number of other circumstances that led to my collapse on Mt Werner. The possible reasons I've had explained to me were exhaustion (16hr drive to get there), electrolyte deficiency, over training, altitude, low body fat, and a minor virus I became aware of 24 hours prior to racing. All things considered the one certainty is that I've gotta start taking my sport more seriously and it turns out that racing 100 miles is a damn hard thing to do.

So I'm gonna continue on with my race schedule with a focused effort of all the peripherals that are essential to ultra running. Any sign of chest pain, my season is done, like a midget at a urinal I'll be on my toes.

Yes I'm disappointed but self-loathing is so pathetic. Instead all guns are pointed at the next race and believe me you, it's a doozy. I'll be announcing my next goal later this week and not to hype it up too much but it'll be the most important endeavour yet.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

Well that didn't end well

Me and Andy at race start
It's 6am Saturday morning in Steamboat Springs CO and instead of running the home stretch of Run Rabbit Run 100M race I'm lying here in the Yampa Valley Medical Center being tested for chest pain and after passing out only 2.5 miles out of the gate in yesterday's race start. The gun rang at noon announcing the start of the RRR100M and immediately started the trudge up Mt Werner. Within minutes I felt like I was working harder than what I should be. I blamed this on the feeling of a tickle in my throat I felt the day before, maybe coming down with a cold. I pressed on hoping I'd fall into a groove. Around 2 miles my pace started dropping and I found the effort I expended was way too high for this climb given it was this early in the race. Only a half a mile later my chest began to hurt coupled with a significant back pain. I remember dropping down to my knee and many runners stopping to assist me. Being my usual self I
told all the racers don't worry about me and run on. A concerned friend who happens to be a doctor Andy Reed had stopped. I nearly needed to beat him off with a stick to get him to move forward and go on with his own race. Shortly after that all I remember was waking up on my back with someone holding my feet in the air and the Race Director (RD) standing overtop of me. If there was one positive at least it happened there and not some distant secluded portion of the course. The RD Paul was extremely helpful and concerned. Next I remember the mountain patrol staff arriving and arranging a transit vehicle to rush me down to the gondola where an ambulance awaited. Thank you to everyone involved for your concern and swift actions I am very grateful. Super disappointed and embarrassed but mostly concerned about my health of course. I've had the most comprehensive exams here at the hospital headed by Cardiologist Dr. Saef. So far he is confused as most tests have returned negative and show a healthy heart. My blood work repeatedly showed a heightened enzyme called Triptonin indicating there was trauma in the heart organ.

I'm labeled a "fall risk" :(
I'm a father of three and that is the most important thing in my life by far, so I need to do the responsible thing by playing safe and have everything checked out. So as it stands now I'll compile all the data we've discovered here and continue the journey with our doctors in Canada to try to unravel what happened or maybe it was just a one off. I will keep running without too much strain and effort until I feel comfortable to pick things up again. It just wasn't my day for Run Rabbit Run...

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Pre Run Rabbit Run

Sleeping in a Hypoxico tent the past
month getting acclimated ...sorry Sharon
This time next week I'll be in Steamboat, Colorado running the Run Rabbit Run 100 miler. It's not my first hundo but it'll be my first big American hundo and that means stiffer competition, more of a spotlight and a whopping 50G purse. To be honest the latter of the two mean very little to me but the thought of running against some of the best hundred mile trail runners in the States really turns my crank. Since December, on two separate occasions when forced to push later past the hundred mile mark I surprised myself by how well I did. The common denominator in both those races was being pressured by competitors to find that extra gear. Turns out I'm one competitive mo-fo with significant control issues.

So my play next weekend is to go out with the lead pack and stick it. One of two scenarios will play out, either crash and burn realizing I am so totally out of my league or a damn successful race. Either way this will hurt worse than a kick in the junk but as odd as that sounds, I'm cool with that. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I think a top ten placement is very doable but if all my ducks line up in a row a top 5 placement isn't a stretch and if doubters would like to warn me how strong the American runners are I'd like to remind them I was the top North or South American at the World 24 hour championships earlier this year in Italy. As my son Sam would say "Booya!"

The race starts at noon on Friday September 18.  My progress can be tracked HERE bib #54

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

God bless the cowboy hat

Influenced by the 19th century Mexican culture the cowboy hat is the defining piece of attire for the North American cowboy. Originally design as a working mans hat to protect from the weather and elements the more modern styles are designed with more fashion in mind. You don't have to hang around the Calgary Stampede too long to notice by simply wearing the hat makes everyone look and feel sexier.

My question to you is if a major portion of ultra trail running is about dodging the elements, then isn't the perfect trail running hat obviously the cowboy hat? The tall crown provides insulation, a place to store ice, the wide brim for shade from the sun and cover from hail and rain. The light weight designs of some of the new straw hats feel like it's not even there.

At Sinister 7 last July the hat saved my ass on leg 3 when the heat of the day rolled in and later protected my melon from the hail storm that blew in on leg 5. I'm not telling you to start running in a Stetson but I am asking all us runners to stay true to the kit that we have found best works for each one of us. In the comment list below post what item you love best in your race kit. Might be unique, functional, humorous, or has simply made a world of difference to your racing.